Last year, he blogged about his "graceless, but still successful" to quit smoking cigarettes. While his deep and abiding addiction to nicotine surely surpassed my own, his struggles epitomized the daily challenges and annoyances all quitters face. "Let's hope nothing great happens" was a memorable concept, as he was given to relapsing during the best of times.
Now he's back with a new Fitness Blog, sarcastically detailing his quest to get into shape. His skewering of fitness culture entertains me to no end. To wit:
I was 30 minutes into the yoga session when a woman in the back of the room, contorted and coated in a fine sheen of sweat, wrapped tight in all the finest and flattering lululemon accessories, let out a splintering fart, making a mockery of the studio’s Far East tranquility vibe...
... I don’t like gyms because of all the strutting and flexing in front of banks of mirrors. Because I have never understood why men, strangers to each other, don’t mind getting naked in the gym locker room. I would rather eat rocks than catch peripheral glimpses of other men’s junk.
... Some of you have tried to sell me something, like "DYLG Consultants" pleading with me in a post to buy an "11 day cleanse" product. I only quit smoking 11 months ago, so it would probably take a fire hose spewing isopropyl down my throat to make my insides look like they belong to a healthy 31-year-old. Let's worry about my colon in a future blog.
And, of course, best of all - I recently got a shout out for an allegedly funny comment I made a couple posts back:
One of my favourite posts may be from "Brandon," who seems to understand my helplessness. After I whined in the blog about my unbalanced diet and penchant for McDonald's, he wrote: "All it takes is one delicious, well-balanced meal to turn that corner. I hate to sound sexist, but could help with your diet be your wife's contribution to your fitness goals?" My wife Brooke did not find this post as funny as I did.
I apologized and suggested couples cooking classes.
4 comments:
I've seen many couples break up after only one person (one half of the relationship) makes significant changes to their lifestyle.
Some people could brush off challenges like getting fit or losing weight as simply cosmetic undertakings....
But you can't underestimate how deeply connected our bodies are with all aspects of our state of mind, emotions, or unconscious fears - the parts of our selves that shape not only the way we look, but how we fit into the world around us.
Is that to say you support the idea of the couples cooking classes or both halves of the relationship contributing to the fitness goals?
"Contributing fitness goals" entails what exactly?...
I'm saying that your advice was good.
(It was advice that "truly warrants the name" advice.)
Oooh that guy's funny, I should follow is blog! "I'd rather eat rocks.." lol
Post a Comment