"He'd smell a soccer jockstrap and faint dead away."

One of things I'll miss most about Canada were the lazy Sundays I spent on the couch, recovering from a hangover or pretending to do schoolwork, watching La Liga from Spain. While the English Premier League is no doubt the most popular competition in the world, for my money the Primera (as it's called over there) is the most exciting.

Real Madrid won the league title in a thriller this year, to my great dismay (as a Barcelona supporter), but the upside is that it excited Ray Hudson, colour commentator and all-around buffoon, to the point of, well, "SHEERDELIGHTORGASMICJUBILATION!"

If you've got speakers, turn them shits up.